Bad Men: The Hidden Roots of Sexual Deception, Harassment and Assault By David Buss

Get it as soon as Wednesday, Oct 6 Bad Men: The Hidden Roots of Sexual Deception, Harassment and Assault

I haven't read this book, yet, and I suspect the previous reviewer had not read it either. I will have read it in a couple weeks time. I like high quality knowledge. I have read several of David Buss's books and they were excellent. Ignore the first review. Woke Critical lens sophists cannot sustain any relationship with quality literature let alone science. They particularly implode in the presence of a coherent human psychology, as their fake sociology is as fragile and fictionally informed as they are. David Buss is a serious and massively celebrated scholar. classiques pour enfants I’m a sucker for books that use evolutionary/biology based explanations to get to the roots of human behavior. A useful, daring and instructive guide for both men and women. David Buss Misandry is high fashion, so the drivel in this book does not surprise me. The author tries to hide politics behind scientific language, but the drivel reads like a woke 'Mein Kampf'. English

When Men Behave Badly is an excellent book laying out decades of research by Buss and his colleagues explaining bad male behavior. Grounded in science and communicated elegantly and engagingly, Buss delivers another must read book. I like the idea of audio books as I have a 8 hour drive twice a week and it's hard to keep the truck on the road while I'm trying to read. Good solution right :)
All jokes aside this book has a lot of good information. However, I don't know if it's the book, or the narrator, but it is kind of monotone and hard to listen to.
This book was suggested to me and I've listened to it 1.5 times so far. There isn't any guidance or paths to recovery or solutions for issues but the information it gives is very factual and encompasses the who what why and how of most if not all bad behaviors of men.
This book is the first building block to finding a path for recovery knowing why we behave the way we do. Being able to put names to our traits will make finding a plan much easer. Also this book would be extremely helpful for women trying to identify problem behaviors for the men in there lives.
Keep in mind I have adult A.D.D. It's not easy to listen to and I imagine it's not at all easy to read, but it's worth the knowledge it possesses. David Buss Sexual conflict permeates our daily lives, and it leads to harm toward both genders. While this book covers several topics that are not fun to discuss (e.g., sexual violence), it does so with a deep review of the scientific literature and careful language accessible to both scholars and laypeople.

Buss's newest boom is a must read for anyone who's been affected by sexual conflict or knows victims of sexual conflict. Superb read. I highly recommend. David Buss “I wanted a lifetime lover and she just wanted a friend.”

â€" Jim Croce

This is a book that every male and female adult would benefit from reading.

David Buss is professor of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. He is the author of the following books:

• The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating
• Evolutionary Psychology: The New Science of the Mind
• Coauthor with Cindy Meston. Why Women Have Sex: Women Reveal the Truth About Their Sex Lives, from Adventure to Revenge (and Everything in Between)
• The Murderer Next Door: Why the Mind Is Designed to Kill
• The Dangerous Passion: Why Jealousy is as Necessary as Love and Sex

Buss, 68, says that for much of his life he’s been very shy with women. He describes himself as, “basically, exclusively, a long term mating guy.” He is divorced with two children; widowed when his second wife died of cancer after a 20 year marriage; and now he says he is very happy with a than eight year partnership with another professor at the University of Texas at Austin.

Buss says he used to view himself as a pure scientist but now admits he has become less “clueless” about the prevalence and damaging effects of sexual harassment and assault towards women He now understands his research has powerful implications to help solve real world problems such as violence against women.

For example, he published a paper in 2011, “The Costs of Rape,” describing the trauma women experience.

His book, When Men Act Badly, examines the hidden roots of sexual conflict. These are deep roots whose causes, in part, stem from evolved sex differences that underly the sexual psychology of females and males. Genetic evolution is a slow process. Cultural evolution moves very quickly. Human sexual psychology evolved over millions of years. Psychological adaptions to sexual conflicts evolved to solve ancient problems

These sexual conflicts show up in relationships between the sexes: sexual harassment, intimate partner violence; sexual assault by strangers, acquaintances and those who claim to be lovers; and stalking in the aftermath of breakups.

Our news media is chock full of men in power who take advantage of women.

For example, Governor Andrew Cuomo is the most recent of too many men who treat women as sexual prey. The165 page report prepared by Letitia James, the Attorney General of New York investigating Governor Cuomo, highlights his behavior: buttocks grabbing, breast grabbing, leering comments and questions such as, Have you cheated on your husband? Have you been with older men? Would you find me a girlfriend? Cuomo saw a woman state trooper who worked for him and got her assigned to his security detail and then targeted her for harassment.

Buss reminds us that biologists define sex by the size of the gametes. Males have small gametes â€" sperm â€" a DNA packed cell with 23 chromosomes, and a flagellum or outboard motor; and females have large gametes with 23 chromosomes â€" and nutrient filled eggs.

Human males make several million sperms per day or about 1,500 per second. Males release anywhere from 20 to 300 million sperm cells in a single milliliter of semen.

For females, during fetal life there are about 6 million to 7 million eggs produced. From this time, no new eggs are produced. At birth, there are approximately 1 million eggs; and by puberty, only about 300,000 eggs remain. Of these remaining eggs, only 300 to 400 will be ovulated during a women’s reproductive years.

Men can produce a child with sexual intercourse (in minutes some women say) with no further investment. Women require a costly nine months of internal gestation to produce that same child, often prolonged by many months of breast feeding.

From an evolutionary perspective, male/female differences in the potential investments of their child show up in motivations for mating. These evolved differences in lust, arousal, jealousy, love, sexual fantasies, and assumptions about others’ sexual interest. These sex differences in human sexual strategies are the key causes of sexual conflict.

Within female and male samples, there are large individual differences. For example, some women and men have strong sexual desires for casual sex with no commitments â€" while others prefer only monogamous relationships. Some women and men remain sexually faithful â€" others prefer affairs. Some females and males harass co workers and show little empathy or remorse.

These are some of the findings Buss discusses through an evolutionary lens. He discusses these findings and in much greater detail.

The Naturalistic Fallacy

Evolutionary psychology focuses on whether men have developed adaptive sexual aggression rape, harassment, assault that results in offspring getting their genes into the next generation. Another view is male sexual aggression is a by product of a strong desire for sexual variety and for low investment sex. Buss believes the by product theory best fits the evidence.

Buss counsels us that what evolutionary psychology uncovers what about men’s sexuality is viewed as adaptive but adaptive does not mean morally good. The naturalistic fallacy then reminds us that identifying reprehensible behaviors does not justify or excuse such behaviors.

Attractiveness Discrepancies

Note: Buss says the qualifier, “on average,” must be inserted before all his research findings. I would add we must treat people as individuals.

People differ in attractiveness, talent, success, wealth, agreeableness, conscientiousness, and .

Is it fair no. Is it reality yes.

These discrepancies translate into mate value and create turmoil and heartache.

To determine mate value, researchers interview subjects of a study for about one hour, using various scales.

On a scale of 1 â€" 10 of mate attractiveness, a man who is a 6 and thinks he’s an 8 will get frustrated when rejected by a woman who is an 8. Research suggests men are likely to overrate their mate value in a variety of domains. Men, for example, often overrate their physical attractiveness thus overestimating their desire on the mating market.

Men view many women as attractive compared to women’s ratings. Females report they are attracted to the top 20th percentile of men.

Buss relates an example of the pervasiveness of attractiveness discrepancies:

After several years of unhappy dating, a female talked with Buss for help:

“Why am I being pestered by guys I don’t care about, but the men I’m genuinely attracted to seem to show little interest in me?

Buss told her that she is an 8 chasing after 10s but being pursued by 6s.

It dawned on her, Buss says, that she was looking to date men just outside her mating range and this discrepancy was the source of her misery. Her belief was reinforced by high mate value men who took her to fancy restaurants and concerts, and were generous and kind, and gave this woman cues they were interested long term commitment when in fact they were only interested in casual sex, or short term mating.

Sexual deception

For example, on dating websites men exaggerate their income by about 20 percent, and round up their height by two inches. Women report their weight about 15 pounds lighter.

Sexual Over Perception Bias

Men tend to commit mind reading errors. Men mistake a female’s smile or other friendly signals for sexual receptiveness.
When, in fact, the woman has no sexual interest in the man.

Number of sexual partners

On average, men prefer sexual variety than women. For example, in Norway, researchers asked people how many sex partners they would prefer over the next 30 years. On average, women reported five, men preferred 25.

Perceived cues of sexual interest

When asked to reflect on their sexual history, women are likely to regret having sex with someone, men are likely to regret not having had sex with someone.

On cheating

On average, males and females offer different reasons why they cheat on their romantic partners. The main reason men stray is for sexual variety. Research indicates on average, men who cheat are just as happy in their marriage as men who are faithful. Women who cheat are often unhappy in their relationships. For men, 30 percent report falling in love with their affair partners, for women it is 79%.

Jealousy

In the United States than twice as many women are shot and killed by their husband or romantic partner than were murdered by strangers using guns, knives, or other means, and women make up the majority of victims of family related homicides. Throughout history, men have attempted to control women’s sexuality and reproductive choices.

The Dark Triad.

The men who act badly towards women often have a combination of the Dark Triad of personality traits: narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy.

Narcissistic men have a strong sense of personal entitlement to sex, and . Machiavellianism is a social strategy of manipulation and exploitation. Psychopathic men are deficient in empathy, are indifferent to others’ suffering, and show little or no remorse.

Buss concludes his excellent book with the following thoughts:

Men’s sexual violence toward women remains the most widespread human rights problem in the world. Deep knowledge of men’s and women’s sexual psychology will help create conditions to reduce sexual violence. Information about the evolutionary history of sexual conflict will help. Knowledge that women are not passive pawns in a male game will help. Progress rests with the recognition of a fundamental change in sexual morality that woman themselves, not boyfriends, husbands, or fathers, should have sole autonomy over their own bodies. Female choice about when, where, with whom, and under which conditions they consent to sex is the deepest and most fundamental component of women’s sexual psychology. It is a fundamental human right. Although men have coevolved strategies to undermine it, that freedom of choice should never be compromised. A deep understanding of the coevolution of sexual conflict in humans will not magically solve all problems. But I am convinced it is the light and the way. Bad Men: The Hidden Roots of Sexual Deception, Harassment and Assault In order to address any problem one must begin by understanding that problem as it is, not as we wish it was. And there are few subjects as thoroughly uncomfortable to delve into the root causes of than sexual assault and male violence towards women.

At each turn, the author carefully uncouples what isâ€"the psychology behind the behaviorsâ€"from what ought to be: a world in which these behaviors are virtually eliminated. This is a feat few manage to do well, which itself is partly to blame for why we have had such poor success in addressing these problems. Paperback